TWIN FLAME HEALING: UNDERSTANDING THE PROCESS

 

What Does it Mean to Be a Spiritual Person?

Being spiritual isn’t something you achieve by merely attending church, living in an ashram for years, or reading every spiritual book available. Even those who appear deeply devoted may not be truly spiritual. Some people, known as "spiritual materialists," use spirituality to enhance their egos, gain popularity, or increase their wealth.

True spirituality begins with good intentions, but ultimately, it’s a person’s actions that determine their place on the spiritual spectrum. Do they consistently show qualities like love, kindness, compassion, humility, tolerance, and forgiveness? That’s what matters.

Once you understand the characteristics of genuinely spiritual people, you’ll know who to look up to as you seek to deepen your spirituality. This will help you avoid spiritual narcissists who may lead you down the wrong path.

What Sets Deeply Spiritual People Apart?

They’re Generous with Their Help Spiritual people eagerly help others because they understand the law of karma—good actions lead to positive outcomes, and bad actions lead to negative ones. Though life doesn’t always seem fair, true spiritual teachers have long taught that no one can escape karma.

These people don’t help others just to get something in return or out of fear; they act from a genuinely kind heart developed over years of practice. While they set healthy boundaries and can’t do everything, they make thoughtful choices to maximize their positive impact. Their generosity stems from an understanding that we’re all connected, and helping others ultimately benefits everyone.

How to Apply This: Society often conditions us to focus on ourselves first. Start by offering small acts of kindness—a compliment, opening a door, or giving spare change to someone in need. Gradually, take on bigger acts of kindness that push your comfort zone. Over time, generosity will become second nature.

They Stay Calm in All Situations Deeply spiritual people understand that life is impermanent. They know that good times don’t last forever, but neither do difficult times. Instead of letting praise or criticism affect them deeply, they keep a balanced perspective and see challenges as chances to grow.

Spiritual people maintain equanimity, or even-mindedness, even under stress. They don’t ignore serious wrongdoing but address it calmly and compassionately.

How to Apply This: Be mindful of your reactions. Instead of getting upset at every inconvenience, ask yourself if it’s truly worth it. Try to empathize with others, even those who challenge you. Remember, “This too shall pass,” and let that thought guide you through difficulties.

They Forgive and Let Go of Grudges Deeply spiritual people don’t respond to harm by holding grudges or waiting for a chance to retaliate. They recognize that others often act from unconscious patterns or childhood wounds and that those who cause harm are often suffering themselves.

Forgiveness allows them to break the cycle of negativity. Holding onto anger only harms the one who holds it.

How to Apply This: Forgiveness isn’t always easy, especially when you’ve been deeply hurt. Instead of reacting out of anger, process your emotions with a friend, therapist, or journal. Remember that holding a grudge usually hurts you more than the person you’re angry with. Even if you can’t let go now, aspire to do so in the future.

As Gandhi wisely said, “An eye for an eye leaves the whole world blind.”

4. They Are Self-Aware

True spirituality isn’t about achieving a blank mind, experiencing vivid visions, or having ecstatic moments. As Buddhist master Dudjom Rinpoche wisely stated, “Experiences are like mist; they will vanish.”

Rather than chasing extraordinary experiences, deeply spiritual individuals focus on being present in every moment. Self-awareness is essential for avoiding negative actions in thought, speech, and behavior. Mindfulness can lower stress, enhance concentration, and improve working memory. However, its deeper purpose lies in helping us cultivate positive actions while letting go of negative ones.

Since thoughts and emotions precede our actions, it’s crucial to be aware of the emotions that arise in your mind. Feelings such as anger, craving, ambition, pride, or jealousy can easily lead to harmful words or actions, resulting in suffering for both yourself and others.

Remember, if negative thoughts or emotions surface, don’t judge yourself. Instead, allow them to pass and refrain from acting on them.

How to Apply This:

Each morning, set an intention to be mindful of your thoughts and emotions, committing to avoid negative actions. In the evening, reflect on your day: celebrate your positive actions and resolve to engage in more good deeds the following day. Identify any negative behaviors, and without self-judgment, commit to refrain from repeating them.

Consider learning mindfulness meditation. Enroll in a course and dedicate 10 to 30 minutes each day to practice. The mindfulness you develop during these sessions will naturally extend into your daily life.

“Mindfulness meditation should be more than just watching what you are doing. What you need to watch is your motivation.” — Thubten Zopa Rinpoche.

5. They See the Divine in Everyone

Deeply spiritual individuals recognize the divine essence in everyone. They look beyond a person's personality to see their spiritual core and refrain from judging others based on their past.

Milarepa, one of Tibet’s greatest saints, had a troubled past—he was murdered in retaliation for being cheated out of his inheritance. However, after feeling remorse for his actions, he sought a spiritual teacher and followed their guidance. He dedicated years to meditation, enduring hardships, and eventually became a revered spiritual master.

This shows that even someone with a dark past can transform into a saint.

We often label others with our judgments and criticisms. Imagine how much lighter we would feel if we made an effort to see the divine in everyone. This doesn’t mean we should be naive or let people take advantage of us; having clarity allows us to recognize potential dangers. Nonetheless, focus on the positive qualities in others and remember that people can change in unexpected ways.

“If you don’t find God in the next person you meet, it is a waste of time looking for him further.” — Mahatma Gandhi.

How to Apply This:

When you meet someone new, let go of any preconceived notions and be present with them. Experience who they are now rather than who you think they will be. Focus on their positive traits instead of perceived negatives.

Final Thoughts

While some deeply spiritual individuals may be born with such qualities, most develop them through conscious choices and years of dedicated practice. They decided to embrace positive actions and avoid negative ones. Even if they stumbled along the way, they persevered until doing good became their instinctive response in any situation.

To deepen your spirituality, start by emulating these five positive habits:

Lend a hand

Take things in stride

Don’t hold a grudge

Cultivate self-awareness

See the divine in everyone

Of course, spirituality encompasses more than just these five habits, but starting with them will set you on a promising path.