Why do I find myself in the position of an outsider peering into a world that often feels unfamiliar? This question has lingered in my thoughts since I was around six years old. My inclination towards being an outsider stems from a combination of intense shyness and an unconventional upbringing, marked by my fundamentalist Christian parents' beliefs. From early on, I was ingrained with the notion that I was a celestial being on Earth, awaiting Jesus to return and transport me to my supposed "true home" in heaven. However, the sense of being an outsider goes beyond religious influence or being categorized as one of the "unpopular kids" in school.
To me, this sensation of being an outsider looking in is inherent, lurking beneath the surface, and appears fundamental to my human experience. I suspect you might resonate with this feeling, or else why would you be perusing this article? Perhaps, like me, you carry this persistent sentiment of being a wanderer in life, always feeling like an outsider despite your proximity to others. This feeling permeates your interactions, observations, dreams, desires, and motivations, persisting at the bookends of your day.
You likely understand what I mean, and it is precisely this sentiment that has driven me to document my thoughts and experiences. But what instigates this shared feeling among us?
I've delved into introspection to uncover the roots of this question. Undoubtedly, there are various reasons for feeling like an outsider. However, the most substantial explanation I've unearthed thus far is connected to the soul – that innate divine spark within us. While we are all born with a soul, not everyone maintains this profound inner connection as they age. Shamanic cultures refer to this disconnection as soul loss, while the awareness that something is amiss is termed a spiritual awakening.
Consequently, those of us who feel like outsiders are simply 'awake' to something that others in society may not perceive. At the heart of feeling like an outsider looking in lies a profound sense that something is askew. We experience a disconnection from the people and environments around us, feeling that we don't belong. This lack of belonging leads to a feeling of not being truly seen or heard, either because we do not feel safe enough to reveal ourselves or because those around us fail to meet a deep soul need.
In simple terms, the core of this outsider sentiment is the belief that something is not quite right. We feel disconnected from our surroundings and people, resulting in a lack of genuine visibility or understanding. This deficiency arises because the superficiality of these connections fails to satisfy our deeper soul needs. In Buddhist terms, we intuitively sense that the world we inhabit is laden with Dukkha (suffering), and the persistent feeling of something missing persists.
This disconcerting sense that the world does not align with our profound soul needs manifests as an existential crisis. For some, this crisis may linger in the background as a constant hum, while for others, it may evolve into a profound existential depression.
However, one thing is nearly certain: feeling like an outsider looking in often initiates a spiritual awakening, propelling one on a quest for profound answers. If you've spent most of your life feeling like an outsider, you likely possess a heightened sensitivity and spiritual receptivity. You've personally encountered the isolating nature of the ego and understand the unnaturalness of existing in a society fixated on fame, status, money, and power. You comprehend the shallowness, meaninglessness, and insanity inherent in leading an ego-centric life, yet articulating these feelings proves challenging. The descriptors of feeling "strange," "weird," "different," and "unworthy" inundate you.
You yearn for a home you've never experienced—a place where understanding, love, and cherishment abound. That place is your soul. Your soul, your True Nature, seeks to rediscover itself. Essentially, what you crave deep down is a sense of home.
Why Being an Outsider is a Spiritual Path
Despite the loneliness associated with feeling like a social outsider, it's crucial to recognize the power and potential inherent in this sacred path. Yes, you heard that correctly. Being an outsider is a distinct path that demands forging a new direction, untraveled before. Your soul determines where this path leads.
In reality, feeling like an outsider serves as a vital impetus for embarking on the spiritual journey. What else would motivate you to seek your true home and a sense of belonging? The very fact that you feel like an outsider signifies your soul's attempt to guide you toward genuine love, understanding, and freedom—toward home.
Nearly everyone I've encountered on the spiritual path identifies with this sense of being an outsider gazing into a world that feels unfamiliar. These individuals exhibit a level of soulful sensitivity surpassing the average person. In essence, they see beyond others' pretenses and the daily rat race, sensing that life holds more than meets the eye. Instead of unquestionably adhering to what they've been taught, these outsiders are inquisitive freethinkers.
Regrettably, societal teachings often brand being an outsider as "bad"—an unsurprising stance given our biological inclination to stay within the safety of our species' groups. However, there comes a point in life when we realize that blindly adhering to societal norms leads to a miserable and unfulfilling existence. While being an outsider may seem isolating, it proves profoundly beneficial for your life. I genuinely wish everyone had the chance to feel like an outsider because it catalyzes self-fulfillment, self-mastery, and self-realization.
If you've delved into Joseph Campbell's archetypal story of The Hero's Journey, a narrative repeated across cultures and epochs, you'll grasp that being an outsider is not only inevitable but necessary for discovering your true purpose and the meaning of life.
So, the mere fact that you perceive yourself as an outsider should be viewed as a positive indication—you're on the right track!
The 9 Hidden Powers of Social Outsiders
We must shift our perspective and regard the status of a lone wolf or free spirit as something positive. In several indigenous cultures, such as those in Africa and Australia, it is encouraged for the younger members to venture out alone into the wilderness as a rite of passage, facilitating self-discovery.
Recognizing that isolation and feelings of solitude are integral to experiencing genuine connectedness is essential. Without this acceptance, we risk becoming easily disoriented, succumbing to the false belief that something is inherently wrong with us. In reality, these feelings may simply be propelling us toward a pursuit of greater depth and spiritual significance.
If you are attuned to your soul, feeling displaced in this world is a natural outcome, and it shouldn't necessarily be perceived as negative. Here are the nine significant advantages of being an outsider:
You liberate yourself from the constraints and indoctrination of societal rules and beliefs, as you can easily discern through them.
You gain more freedom to heed the voice of intuition within yourself, guiding your entire life.
Solitude provides the opportunity to discover what it truly means to be authentic in a society constantly challenging your genuineness.
You maintain a broader perspective, avoiding being bogged down by trivial details.
Connecting with your soul becomes more accessible compared to others.
You are granted the space and liberty to grow in any direction and embrace a free-spirited lifestyle.
The chance to experience profound connection emerges as you find a like-minded group of individuals or a soul family.
Your ability to observe others enhances your wisdom and compassion.
The status of being an outsider catalyzes authentic self-fulfillment and potential spiritual ascension, should you opt for that path.
While being an outsider may bring about profound loneliness, it is, in fact, a privileged position. Departing from the societal herd enables you to thrive and unfold in ways unattainable while conforming to "normalcy" and social "acceptability."
To conclude, I leave you with a profound quote from spiritual teacher Eckhart Tolle to ponder:
To a certain degree, being an outsider not only adds complexity to life but also positions you at an advantageous standpoint in terms of enlightenment. It forcibly removes you from a state of unconsciousness.
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