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11 Concrete Signs They’re Not Your Twin Flame – They’re Just a Narcissistic Jerk

 


We are currently fortunate to live in a remarkable era, a time when a myriad of spiritual paths, faiths, and belief systems are easily accessible to us. One captivating concept within this spiritual landscape is the idea of the "twin flame," which represents the reflection and complement of our soul, a partner with whom we are destined to create a profound impact on the world. However, it's important to acknowledge that while this concept is beautiful, some individuals take it to the extreme, leading to the rationalization of harmful and destructive relationships. Moreover, narcissistic manipulators often exploit these spiritual beliefs to maintain their control over victims ensnared in abusive relationships. It's critical to discern between these spiritual ideals and the stark reality of toxic relationships. The following are unmistakable signs that the person in question is not your twin flame or divine counterpart; they are, in fact, a narcissistic individual.


They deliberately alternate between affection and aloofness to keep you emotionally entangled.

In the world of twin flames, the dynamics often involve a "runner" and a "chaser." A manipulative individual masquerading as your soulmate may shower you with affection initially to captivate your heart, only to retreat when you attempt to deepen the connection. This leaves you in the role of the pursuer, despite them initiating the chase. In contrast, an authentic partner remains consistent in their commitment to you. While real love can indeed be intimidating, it should not be riddled with inconsistency and mind games.


Your sense of "awakening" with this person is emotionally turbulent or toxic.

While it's common to believe that romantic relationships should provide moments of awakening, it's essential to tread carefully in this territory. True awakening, when found with your soulmate, feels like a tranquil and harmonious hearth rather than a chaotic and abusive wildfire. An authentic partner helps you discover and embrace your strengths and talents rather than intensifying your sorrows.


They exploit your spirituality as a means of manipulation instead of fostering a genuine connection.

Narcissists and other toxic individuals approach your spiritual beliefs with ulterior motives. They aim to manipulate and control you by using these beliefs to their advantage. If they sense that you possess excessive compassion, they will skillfully employ sob stories and pity tactics to manipulate you into fulfilling their needs, continually pushing boundaries.


You constantly feel drained rather than nourished by this relationship.

In a relationship with this toxic partner, you find yourself emotionally depleted daily. They manufacture baseless arguments, treat you with disrespect and contempt, disregard your needs, and convince you that your requests are unreasonable, even when they are entirely reasonable. Many people mistakenly endure this pain and mistreatment, believing they are fighting for a love worth preserving when, in reality, they are clinging to something that will ultimately destroy them. Consider this: Does a genuine "soul awakening" and "enlightenment" involve being so exhausted that you cannot fulfill your life's mission or maintain your mental well-being? The answer is clear.


They do not assist you in healing past traumas, fears, or insecurities; instead, they exacerbate them, and the "night of the soul" seems never-ending.

The concept of twin flames involves the idea that these partners trigger past wounds and traumas, bringing them to the surface for resolution. There is a stage in the twin flame journey known as the "night of the soul," which signifies a final purification before "reunion" with the twin flame. However, when dealing with a toxic or narcissistic partner, they may indeed bring up past wounds, but they intend to agitate you and create new traumas. In a relationship with a narcissist, the night of the soul can feel endless, with minimal purification or healing. True healing often begins when you break free from the narcissist for good.


Deception prevails over authenticity and truth in this relationship.

In a harmonious partnership, there is no need for deception or misrepresentation. You and your partner do not lie or present false images of yourselves. Narcissists are habitual liars and gaslighters who frequently distort the truth to keep you in a constant state of uncertainty. In a toxic relationship, you do not feel grounded in any form of certainty or truth; your perception of reality is constantly distorted.


Your self-worth and irreplaceability are in question.

A healthy partner who is meant to be with you will never make you feel disposable or imply that they are seeking validation from external sources. In contrast, toxic narcissistic partners intentionally provoke jealousy and create a sense of competition, undermining your self-esteem.


Your true self can shine with a healthy partner, whereas with a narcissist, you must wear a mask to survive.

Being with your divine counterpart should allow you to be your authentic self without the need for constant explanations or defense against unwarranted criticism and false accusations. Conversely, a toxic partner erodes your self-identity and forces you to hide aspects of yourself to avoid attacks or scrutiny.


Vulnerability fosters a genuine connection with a healthy partner, while with a narcissist, it opens the door to further exploitation.

A healthy partner creates an atmosphere of trust and safety in which you feel comfortable being vulnerable. They support your growth, making you feel loved and valued. Narcissists, on the other hand, exploit your vulnerabilities to destabilize and terrorize you, using your deepest fears and insecurities against you.


Pursuing your dreams and goals is seamless with a healthy partner, but narcissists seek to diminish your light and make you feel small.

Narcissists criticize and undermine your achievements and strengths because they feel threatened by your success and your ability to find validation outside of them. A healthy partner or "twin flame" will encourage and support your fulfillment and success, bringing you closer to your true life mission and the greater good. They will walk hand in hand with you to co-create and change the world for the better.


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