As soon as I discovered the term 'twin flame', I began questioning whether my experience with this person was true or false. This is a difficult question to answer because the storyline of a false twin flame is almost identical to that of a real one. I spent countless hours reading and watching videos online to determine if the man I had met was truly my twin flame. Many twin flames have similar characteristics to narcissists, and if you think your twin flame is a narcissist, it may be an opportunity for self-reflection. The intense feelings of love, codependency, and the cycle of love bombing, turmoil, discarding, and hoovering are all signs of both a narcissistic relationship and a twin flame bond. Some articles suggest that a false twin flame is a toxic or narcissistic relationship that you must leave to make space for your true twin flame. However, based on my twin flame journey, I have learned valuable lessons and come to two conclusions.
The presence of narcissistic traits in both real and false twin flames is quite common. However, it's crucial to note that not all narcissists are twin flames, particularly those with Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD). If you believe that you're in a twin flame relationship, it's necessary to delve deeper into narcissism. Although twin flames are genuine, they exist because we need to heal something within ourselves. Have you considered the possibility that you might also exhibit narcissistic behaviors? Furthermore, if you're in a toxic relationship that isn't a twin flame, you may be dealing with someone who has NPD, and recognizing the warning signs is critical. But how can you tell if your narcissistic partner is a twin flame? Here are some uncommon indications that both of you are engaged in a twin-flame dynamic:
The most straightforward approach to determine if your partner is your twin flame is by checking if you both underwent a spiritual awakening after meeting each other. Spiritual awakening involves awakening from our society's matrix. You can see beyond the layers of money, power, and ego that define our society. You begin to question everything around you, feel profoundly unhappy with your way of life, and have an intense desire to figure things out. If your partner is also experiencing a spiritual awakening, it's crucial to pay attention because they might be your twin flame and in your life to teach you significant lessons. While a narcissist may also experience a spiritual awakening, they use it to boost their ego. They may try to convince others that they are more special or the 'Chosen One' with a unique connection to the divine. However, you will soon realize that this is merely another aspect of their narcissism, and what they do is not genuine.
One of the reasons twin flame relationships are incredibly intense is that they trigger all of our core traumas. You may have never thought it possible to love someone so deeply, yet they can also cause intense anxiety. This occurs because a twin flame acts as a mirror and forces you to confront yourself. It can be difficult to handle this reflection, and one of you may run away (known as the runner/chaser stage). If your twin flame only worsens your core traumas and doesn't activate them, you're likely dealing with a non-twin flame narcissist. A toxic individual is playing a game, while a twin flame's presence will activate your core traumas.
Twin flames embody the yin and yang, representing masculine and feminine energies (regardless of gender). Your twin flame possesses what you lack and vice versa, and you both learned similar life lessons through opposite experiences. When together, it feels like you are complete. This is because the qualities you admire in your twin flame are also present within yourself, and the traits you dislike in them are shadows within yourself. At the core, you are the same soul, but in human form, you are opposites. Despite this, both of you understand that being together is rare and do everything possible to make it happen.
When you encounter your twin flame, your life will be transformed in ways you never thought possible. The connection you share with this person is unique and unlike any other. They feel it too. This experience ignites a strong desire to explore and uncover the mysteries of the universe. You begin to ask questions such as: Why am I feeling this way? What other secrets does the universe hold? Who am I? Who are they?
A genuine twin flame relationship inspires a deep yearning to understand yourself. You are not only seeking a partner but also seeking to define yourself through this relationship. Both of you have a strong desire to evolve and learn what lies deep within. At times, the desire to grow may even supersede the desire to be with your partner, as you realize that being together can hinder personal growth. This is why the "runner" twin flame may try to distance themselves from the relationship.
Meeting your twin flame can completely upend your life. You may meet them at an inconvenient time - perhaps one of you is already married, or there's a significant age gap, or they don't fit the mold of what you thought you wanted in a partner. But regardless of the circumstances, encountering your twin flame will cause a shift in the direction of your life.
You may find yourself taking risks and pursuing things that previously seemed impossible. Maybe you'll finally find the courage to leave an unfulfilling marriage or quit your job to pursue a long-held dream. You may even decide to move to a new country or start a family, despite having never considered those things before. The presence of your twin flame will give you the strength and determination to make changes in your life that you may have never thought possible.
In a twin flame relationship, your consciousness transforms. Your empathic abilities increase, particularly towards your twin flame. You experience emotions that you never felt before. You may even perceive auras. Your connection with your twin flame is so strong that you can sense their feelings even when they are physically distant. You also experience moments of clarity regarding the problems they are facing. Some individuals even establish a telepathic connection. For instance, I recall waking up at the same time my twin flame started his morning meditation, even though he was in a different time zone, one hour ahead of me. Following our breakup, I still had conversations with him in my subconscious mind that revealed information I could not have possibly known. These conversations later proved to be true.
While I do not encourage the use of psychedelics, it is worth noting that they can reveal hidden truths that we may not be willing to acknowledge ourselves. I once believed that leaving my twin flame, who I thought was a narcissist, was the right decision for my safety and well-being. However, every time I consumed psychedelics (such as shrooms, LSD, or breathwork that elevated my consciousness), I would feel his spirit surrounding me with love and warmth. It confused me, as I couldn't understand how a narcissist could make me feel so safe. During my trips, he would guide me and protect me, and afterward, I would feel immense empathy for him once again. I learned that narcissists have a beautiful soul that is trapped inside a broken mind. I saw glimpses of that soul during our relationship, and psychedelics reminded me of it whenever I had forgotten. While I could write a whole book on the revelations I received during altered states of mind, it's worth considering that psychedelics might reveal the truth about your twin flame. However, I advise against their use without caution and proper supervision.
Despite trying various methods such as attending healing ceremonies, cutting energetic cords during meditations, releasing him during lunar cycles, and writing about why they should not be together, They think about him every day, see his car on every street corner, and dream about him almost every night. Despite attempting to fill the void by sleeping with other men, they cannot find a connection similar to what they had with their twin flame.
In a typical narcissistic relationship, the end brings relief as the truth is finally revealed and the desire to return to the abuser fades away to avoid further hurt. However, a twin flame relationship is different as it is meant to be and thus, one cannot forget their twin flame easily. Despite speaking ill of him, I would feel remorseful the next day as I sensed that he was also healing and I might have to give him another chance someday.
Unconditional love is often mentioned in twin flame stories, but it is impossible to love someone without loving oneself. Can you genuinely wish the best for your twin flame regardless of their choices, including being with someone else? Do you still love them even if they never come back? Do you feel empathy for their struggles? Or are you secretly envious of their speedy recovery, resentful for their departure, or sour because they do not acknowledge your divine bond? A twin flame inspires authentic unconditional love.
Despite learning that my twin flame was dating one of my close friends who knew about my heartbreak, I still felt compassion for him after the initial shock. I understood that he needed to go through this experience to mature, and I wished them both happiness. I genuinely wanted him to find what he was seeking, even if it meant being with my friend. This realization marked a significant step towards overcoming my narcissism.
Believers in twin flames know that nothing can keep them apart if they are meant to be together. Even if it takes years or lifetimes to reunite, it will happen. However, the reunion can only occur when both individuals have learned their soul lessons and healed from their core traumas and deepest shadows. It's pointless to force a twin flame reunion if one person is not ready or refuses to heal. Therefore, trust in divine timing and each other's pace. Narcissism and twin flames often intersect, as the latter catalyzes self-reflection and growth. If you recognize your twin flame signs, start with inner child work and shadow work to heal yourself. Your partner should do the same if they're truly your twin. If, on the other hand, you're in a narcissistic relationship without any twin flame signs, educate yourself about narcissism and leave your partner. Be wary of spiritual narcissism, a form of narcissism where people use spirituality and special gifts to feel superior to others. Protect yourself and let go if your partner is unwilling to heal from their narcissistic personality disorder.
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